Men want more family time



By Majed Iqbal

Men are increasingly yearning for a better work-life balance and want their partners to share the role of breadwinner so they can spend more time with their children, according to a survey published today. Male Magazine FHM commissioned a study, questioning 2,000 men around the UK with an average age of 30 about their views on Work life, equality and family.

Surprisingly, findings showed that men feel women have now changed their minds and want to go back to old roles. Half of men with a baby or young children say their partner "now wants him to earn enough so she can be a full-time mother", while 38% say their partner wants them to earn enough to allow her to work part-time.

Another study, published yesterday by the government's digital information and advice service Directgov, found that almost a third of UK parents feel their greatest stress is not spending enough time with their children.

The studies conducted highlight an attempt to understand the pressures being faced in modern British Society in tackling changing gender roles, achievement of both career goals and fulfillment, and a happy family life.

In a society modelled on commercial gain and the principles of benefit, both men and women are viewed as an economic product. The value of a person rests upon how much can be sucked out of each individual to generate wealth regardless of their gender.

It is therefore understandable why the Labour Government introduced a ''National Childcare Strategy'' in 1998 to provide thousands more child care places that would provide the mothers a place to leave their children while they pursued their careers, providing financial benefits such as the working families tax credit to make childcare more affordable.
T
his in itself creates problems expressed in the survey where 40% of those with children aged seven to nine, could not reconcile Britain's long hours working culture with family responsibilities, affecting both fathers and mothers equally.

The juggling of responsibilities for males and females has resulted in a number of problems within western societies. It has caused a strain on marriages and increased divorce due to the limited time the husband and wife spend with one another and with their children.

Even after 30 years of championing equality, women's rights, shared responsibility in the UK only 4% of judges are women, 11% are managers, and 2% of FTSE 100 directors are women.

In a book by Lisa Belkin called ''Life's Work: Confessions of an Unbalanced Mom'', she writes, ''Not a one of us seems to be able to give 100% of themselves to their job and 100% of themselves to their family, and 100% of themselves to taking care of themselves''.

Such ideals, values and visions are harmful for society and individuals and should in no way be a standard for Muslims. Islam provides its own solutions which create vibrant family structures, a source of happiness and tranquillity, and a bright future for children.

It is high time that the host population and government consider deliberating over Islamic ideals rather than continuing to force the Muslim community to integrate with a set of values which has been damaging to its own social fabric.

Allah (swt) says: ''And wish not the things in which Allah has made some of you excel others. For man is allotted from what they have earned, (and likewise) from the woman there is allotted from what they have earned'' [An-Nisa: 32].